


Tomorrow Is Your Hope At The End of The Day

by FineSpecimenRetrieved



Series: here comes the first step [3]
Category: Homestuck
Genre: Angst and Fluff, But dont worry they're okay now, Comfort, Gen, Happy Ending, Humanstuck, Kinda, Meowrails, Moirails, One Shot, Other, Past Character Death, Queerplatonic Relationships, Reincarnation, it's complicated - Freeform, sorta - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-10
Updated: 2019-03-10
Packaged: 2019-11-14 15:48:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,678
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18055403
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FineSpecimenRetrieved/pseuds/FineSpecimenRetrieved
Summary: He woke up gasping, the phantom feeling of suffocation choking his breath and the desperate need to make sure Nepeta was safe pounding in his chest.(In which they are humans, still suffering from the knowledge of the past. From the deaths of the past. It is a comfort, to know he isn't alone.)Title taken from First Aid Kit's 'Stay Gold'.





	Tomorrow Is Your Hope At The End of The Day

**Author's Note:**

> This is a gift for Aunt Noah on the HS Renaissance Server! I'm sorry this is so late, but I hope you enjoy! The adorable art was done by Emma! Thank you so much!!!
> 
> Title taken from First Aid Kit's 'Stay Gold'.

The string slowly tightened, gradually cutting off his air supply, even as he scrabbled at his neck and tried to cut the cord. The gleam of a grin caught his eyes, and he could only stare in horror at the monster his acquaintance had become. He couldn’t stop himself from flicking a look at the vent grate, desperate to catch a glimpse of his Moirail, safe and hidden. Choking as the grip tightened, he was forced to look away. His knee pounded in agony, and he knew there was no escaping. Not from a purple blood on a rampage. His only hope was that she would escape safely, would keep herself away and get help for herself. That she wouldn’t try to take Gamzee on.

Letting out a croaking gasp, he felt his lungs burn in agony, body slowly collapsing to the floor.

Equius woke up wheezing, the feeling of his throat slowly closing shut leaving him coughing and desperate for air. At the bottom of the bed, he felt one of the cats shuffle, make a small sound of protest at their rude awakening, before settling down again. He knew he should be quieter, should have choked down his hoarse heaving, but in that moment he couldn’t stop himself, couldn’t stop the burning in his lungs, the pounding feeling of wrongness, of blood and death in his chest. He could still feel the phantom string around his neck slowly tying off his air supply, the glowing eyes staring down at him in gleeful rage-

The knowledge that his Moirail would soon be dead next to him. He hadn’t ever seen the scene of the crime, hadn’t woken up fast enough to be there for her when he passed into the dream bubble, but he could imagine enough.

He could hear the shrieks of his Moirail ringing in his ears as she leapt out of cover in furious grief, ringing in his mind as they slowly morphed into screams of agony and pain, mixing together with the smack of clubs and crunch of bones. Could imagine the feel of hot blood splattering his face, could see it paint the walls and floor as she slowly collapsed to the floor in a broken heap, eyes wide and mouth open in a gasping desperation as she waited for the killing blow. He shuddered heavily and found his eyes immediately roving in the dark, hands shuffling along the sheets until he found a warm arm.

“Nepeta,” he whispered harshly, gently squeezing her arm. He might not have had his super strength anymore, but old habits die hard, and even in these fragile human bodies, he couldn’t stop himself from holding back. “Nepeta?”

For a moment, there was silence, and he couldn’t stop the panic rising in his chest, heart pounding desperately as the worst scenarios possible overtook his mind, terror and dread forcing his limbs to shake her again, to clutch at her tightly and beg over and over that she was okay, that she was-

“Whaaaat?” She drawled out sleepily, trying to swat at him with her free arm, and he immediately sagged in relief, ragged breaths escaping his mouth.

“Oh thank God,” he mumbled, uncaring of his curse. “I thought- For a second you were-”

Nepeta cracked open an eye and softened, and despite the sleep in her eyes and tiredness dragging her limbs, she lifted herself up to look at him properly.

“I’m fine you big goof, just tired,” she reassured him, reaching out to squeeze his hand and pull him closer. She let him rest his head against her collar bone, drooping her head down to rest on top of his, pressing soft kisses to his hair. He couldn’t stop the tears welling up in his eyes, the need to clutch onto her and hold her tightly, to make sure she was safe, to make sure she never-

This human world was softer than Alternia, but there were still wars, still death and murder and while he knew that Nepeta could defend herself, was damn good at it as well, the Troll-part of him that remained screamed that they were in danger, that he wouldn’t be able to protect her properly, that he wouldn’t be able to keep her safe. It was stupid, and sexist as she would say, playfully hitting his shoulder when he automatically reared up to defend her, but every time he closed his eyes he saw olive blood sprayed across the floor and walls, her head bashed in and limbs broken as she lay dying in agony.

And it had been his fault. If only he had stood up for her sooner, if only he had decided not to go after the Highblood, if only, if only, if only. But he hadn’t and they had both paid for it, her more than him. Moirails may not have existed here, but Equius could never think of her as anything else, as anything other than his support, his protector, his comfort, and he knew she felt the same way. To her he was her encouragement, her defender, her solace when things got too much. They had discussed it after finding each other again in this life, after stumbling upon each other completely by coincidence. There may not have been Moirails here, but he was never going to let her go again, unless she wanted of course, because he just… he couldn’t lose her again.

Their relationship was strange by the standards of humans, not quite romantic, but intimate in the way spouses would interact. They trusted each other, supported each other, looked after each other, because they loved each other. It was simple, in a complicated way. The only intimacy went up to sharing a bed at night, soft gentle kisses of reassurance and love, without the expectation of romance as humans always seemed to hold. He loved her, yes, would spend the rest of his life with her if she wanted, but there would never be anything beyond the Moirallegiance that they had known back on Alternia. It just… didn’t translate well into human terms, that was all, especially now that they were both adults.

“You’re thinking too meowch again,” Nepeta muttered quietly into his head, sleep lacing her voice, and he cringed. It wasn’t solely because of the terrible cat pun.

“Sorry.” He looked up at her, and she gazed at him with one eye open, amusement written among the tiredness.

“You’re fine, do you want to talk?”

He hesitated, wondered if he should burden her with every thought, every dream that rushed through his mind, but they had agreed to be honest with each other, to let each other offer comfort and support when needed.

“It was simply… a dream. Of… well, you know.” Equius couldn’t stop himself from rubbing at his neck, the phantom feeling of the string pressing against his skin, and he watched her eyes glint in fury.

“If we ever find that bastard, I’m gonna fucking scratch his face off,” she hissed out, and he reached up to cup her cheek, not interested in ‘correcting her vulgarity’, since she had threatened to kick him every time he did it. A part of him called for blood as well, for vengeance, for justice- but this wasn’t the meteor.

This wasn’t Alternia.

They were tired of living like Trolls, when they could be softer, more… human. They could live their lives in comfort, without the fear of service and death in the name of the Empire, without the terror of being split up, never to know what would happen to the other.

“Only if we find him,” he mumbled back, “but otherwise, I find enough comfort in your presence.” She softened again, leaned down to rest her forehead against his, despite the awkward angle. They were silent, for a moment, before she asked:

“What if we got like… married? Human married, which is really weird, considering we’re humans, but I don’t think either of us are gonna find someone else, and even if we do, we’re not really gonna… stop seeing each other.” Equius froze. Was she… honestly proposing to him? She raised an eyebrow expectantly.

“It would still be the same like now, but we’d get more benefits, like taxes are better right? Plus, it would stop everyone and their mother from asking us what our relationship is, and us saying 'oh, we’re together but we’re not fucking cause that’s gross' is really weird to explain,” she continued, and he cringed at her language.

“Must… must you put it so crudely Nepeta?” He tentatively asked, but she waved him off, still staring at him curiously.

“Listen, do you want to get married or not?” She was blunt and straight to the point, and he sighed, rubbing his face with his free hand.

“I mean, surely you must know I wouldn’t be averse, but-”

“Great, it’s settled then. You are now my furancé.” There was a wide grin on her face, eager hope and delight lighting up her features, and he found himself smiling at her.

“Yes, I suppose you are now my furancée as well.” Nepeta laughed loudly at his response, ducking her head when a disgruntled cat meowed in protest and the noise, and pressing another kiss to his head.

“Right, I’m really tired now, so I’m gonna go back to sleep Mr. Furancé. We can plan more in the morning.” She plonked herself back down, pulling him close to her so that her head rested again above his. He felt the tension from before slowly leak out as the security of his Moirail and the future eased his limbs into heaviness.

“Goodnight… Nepeta,” he muttered into her neck, and she breathed out softly, already asleep.

Closing his eyes, he knew that no more nightmares would come. Not tonight, not when he was caught up in an embrace of safety and love, the knowledge that they were both safe, that they would be able to live out their lives fully in peace, together, gently rocking him to sleep.

**Author's Note:**

> So this is a short interlude (?) to this series, but I'll do a proper full meowrail fic soon, I'm just. Completely swamped with school at the moment. It's the final push to final exams and then graduation!


End file.
